Saturday, June 28, 2008
anger management
and then i'll run as fast as i can.
Thursday, June 26, 2008
no. 9
You Are 9: The Peacemaker |
![]() You are emotionally stable and willing to find common ground with others. Your friends and family often look to you to be the mediator when there is conflict. You are easy going and accepting. You take things as they come. Avoiding conflict at all costs, you're content when things are calm. At Your Best: You feel connected, trusting, and fulfilled. You feel at peace with your place in the world. At Your Worst: You compromise your values to make sure peace is maintained. You give in to bullies. Your Fixation: Harmony Your Primary Fear: Causing conflict Your Primary Desire: To preserve things as they are Other Number 9's: Marge Simpson, Ronald Reagan, Audrey Hepburn, Jerry Seinfeld, and Abraham Lincoln. |
Friday, June 20, 2008
dreams
i invited you to give a talk to a group of people at an event. you said yes. but i found it weird that you looked like how you were back in college when you transferred already at the other university. your hair was how i saw it in one of your pictures in your bedroom.
you were wearing an orange shirt, which was strange because you don't wear that color.
you delivered your talk in tagalog, which was another strange thing, because you taught english grammar.
while delivering your talk, you addressed one girl in the audience (who was also in orange) as "babe", and asked her a question in english. i remember feeling so furious when you did that. but i also remembered that talk about calling me 'dear' not 'babe'. i couldn't see her face. she was petite though. and i only remember her hair.
at the end of your talk, the same girl approached you and talked to you. i was already feeling jealous. and my jealousy heightened when you left the venue with her. i was so furious and so hurt that my friend had to comfort me. it also felt weird that i didn't know her but i knew her name.
i was surprised when you came back. but i only saw you from afar. you were looking for someone. i knew you were looking for me because i was the only one who knew in that event.
i was relieved for a moment. but when you saw me looking at you, you suddenly avoided my look and left as if you got scared.
i was so hurt in that dream. it felt real. so real that i woke up crying.
2
i was inside a bedroom that looked like mine. my mom was knocking at the door so i opened it and she told me that something was already taken care of, that your parents already bought it for my parents and that i need not worry about it. in my dream i felt weird about that. i was thinking why would your parents do that for my parents. and i realized in my dream that we were already married, probably civilly, and that your parents wanted us to get married because of my situation. i was pregnant in my dream.
i was in a big bedroom, a bedroom which seemed like it was situated in a condominium. i was lying down on the bed, taking my rest, talking to a fat, asian-looking woman who seemed like she was a stand-up comedienne. she was trying to make me laugh. she was asking me how i could have ridiculously forgotten to inform my friends that i already got married to you.
in my dream, i was only 2 months pregnant but i already felt the belly bump. i was telling this woman how i excited i was for the baby.
at one end of the room near the big bedroom windows, you were seated in front of the computer busy doing work. i was rubbing my belly when i felt 2 heartbeats. i was so excited i called you to come over so you could also feel the heartbeat. you wouldn't leave what you were doing. i called over and over again but you wouldn't come. until you finally stood up and walked a few steps, but your eyes and your attention was still on the computer. i felt so disappointed because of your reaction that i said 'nevermind'. and the moment i said that, you immediately went back to your work.
i went to sit on the floor by the bedroom window just behind you and just stared at the view outside. i looked at you and i felt sad. the fat lady saw everything that happened. she went to me and asked me what's the problem with you. i just said you're too busy. she asked me if i was ok with that, if i was ok about everything. and i replied to her saying 'this is how it is'.
again, i woke up with tears in my eyes.
3
we were lying on my bed.
you were looking straight in my eyes, touching my face.
your eyes were sad.
and you hugged me and kissed me.
and then you said you missed me.
i wished it to be true. i yearned for it to be so true.
4
a short one. you said you missed me. you hugged me and kissed me.
5
i was with a friend at a beach resort that looked like the one i went to recently. i was surprised to see you there. and then you kept me company. but i was feeling a bit of distance. the distance i felt the last time i saw you. in my dream, i was denying that feeling. you were there but i didn't feel you "there".
we crossed the beach walking, you were walking ahead of me, eager to reach the shore. when my friend had the chance to talk to me alone, she asked me i was with you. i told her you wanted to go with me. and she said i should be cautious now, that i should guard myself this time and guard my heart coz you might disappear again anytime just like you did.
you were walking ahead of us. i was still having a talk with my friend so we continued walking but you stayed at the deck near the shore. i left my bag and my phones with you before proceeding to that walk and you said you might go ahead later on back to our room.
when my friend and i got back to the deck, you were gone with the things i left with you except for my phone. i figured you went ahead back to our room already and you had my bag with you.
it was a long walk going back to the rooms. when we reached the floor of our rooms, i was shocked to hear two voices coming from our bedroom. one was yours. the other one was a female person's. the bedroom had two doors beside each other. both doors were open. the entrance to the bedroom looked like my own bedroom.
since both doors were already open, i partly saw the view of the room, but i already saw the edge of the bed. and i could see that you were lying on the bed because i saw your legs near the edge. but i also saw the view of the back of the girl who was on top of you. both of you weren't naked but it seemed like you were having sex while talking. i could hear you both talking.
my friend was walking ahead of me. she was already able to enter the room and i was just behind her. i almost entered the room. and as if sensing the tension and the panic that i was feeling, she slammed the other door shut so i wouldn't have to see the whole thing that was happening inside our room.
i couldn't find myself entering the room anymore. i was in shock, in pain. i couldn't breathe and tears were just flowing from my eyes. i was in a daze. i didn't know if i was going to run away from that place or if i was going to show up inside the room. i felt so confused.
i think i tried to run away silently. but my tears overflowed and i was having trouble breathing i wanted to scream. just like how i wanted to scream when i learned about the post you made at this site that our friend saw.
surprisingly, i woke up not crying. i was just relieved to know that it was just a dream. but it made me think.
6
we were at a store that looked like saks on fifth avenue in new york. we started running after each other, sometimes holding hands sometimes just running like kids playing tag. we were happy like kids. i felt happy.
sometimes, while running, you would be so near me, you'd grab me and hug me from behind and smell my hair. and we'd just continue running and gliding like the floors were so smooth to glide on. i felt so good at those times.
later on, it seemed like we were both running to catch up on something, like having to meet a deadline. at the end of that store, there was an elevator. we went inside it. and when it opened to a different floor, we got off to an office that looked like a psychiatrist's office.
you sat on one chair and there was another man in the room, a foreigner. he was surprised to see me there. he was a bit alarmed actually. i think he was still the one in session and that we came too early. he wasn't finished yet so he told me i wasn't supposed to be there in the room. i looked at you and had a questioning look on my face. and, as if, reading my mind, you said it was ok, that i can wait outside until it was your turn, that you were going to wait inside because it was ok and that you were next. and i figured that this was a visit to your psychiatrist. i was about to go out of the room when the man asked me a favor that if a man named howard was looking for him, have howard go inside the room.
i went outside. and then i woke up.
***
i wish i knew what my dreams about you meant. i wish they could give me answers to my questions. i wish it held the key to unlocking the mystery that is you.
.
Thursday, June 19, 2008
My Birthday meaning
27 December 1978
Your date of conception was on or about 5 April 1978 which was a Wednesday.
You were born on a Wednesday
under the astrological sign Capricorn.
Your Life path number is 1.
Your fortune cookie reads:
Let there be magic in your smile and firmness in your handshake.
Life Path Compatibility:
You are most compatible with those with the Life Path numbers 1, 5 & 7.
You should get along well with those with the Life Path numbers 3 & 9.
You may or may not get along well with those with the Life Path number 8.
You are least compatible with those with the Life Path numbers 2, 4, 6, 11 & 22.
The Julian calendar date of your birth is 2443869.5.
The golden number for 1978 is 3.
The epact number for 1978 is 21.
The year 1978 was not a leap year.
Julian date:
The number of days since noon 4713 BC January 1.
Golden Number:
A number showing the year of the lunar or Metonic cycle. It is reckoned from 1 to 19, and is so called from having formerly been written in the calendar in gold.
Epact Number:
The moon's age at the beginning of the calendar year, or the number of days by which the last new moon has preceded the beginning of the year.
Julian date:
The number of days since noon 4713 BC January 1.
Your birthday falls into the Chinese year beginning 2/7/1978 and ending 1/27/1979.
You were born in the Chinese year of the Horse.
Your Native American Zodiac sign is Goose; your plant is Bramble.
You were born in the Egyptian month of Famenoth, the third month of the season of Poret (Emergence - Fertile soil).
Your date of birth on the Hebrew calendar is 28 Kislev 5739.
Or if you were born after sundown then the date is 29 Kislev 5739.
The Mayan Calendar long count date of your birthday is 12.18.5.9.5 which is
12 baktun 18 katun 5 tun 9 uinal 5 kin
The Hijra (Islamic Calendar) date of your birth is Wednsday, 26 Muharram 1399 (1399-1-26).
The date of Easter on your birth year was Sunday, 26 March 1978.
The date of Orthodox Easter on your birth year was Sunday, 30 April 1978.
The date of Ash Wednesday (the first day of Lent) on your birth year was Wednesday 8 February 1978.
The date of Whitsun (Pentecost Sunday) in the year of your birth was Sunday 14 May 1978.
The date of Whisuntide in the year of your birth was Sunday 21 May 1978.
The date of Rosh Hashanah in the year of your birth was Monday, 2 October 1978.
The date of Passover in the year of your birth was Saturday, 22 April 1978.
The date of Mardi Gras on your birth year was Tuesday 7 February 1978.
As of 6/18/2008 11:02:17 PM EDT
You are 29 years old.
You are 354 months old.
You are 1,538 weeks old.
You are 10,766 days old.
You are 258,407 hours old.
You are 15,504,422 minutes old.
You are 930,265,337 seconds old.
Celebrities who share your birthday:Heather O'Rourke (1975) G‚rard Depardieu (1948) Cokie Roberts (1943) John Amos (1939) Oscar Levant (1906) Marlene Dietrich (1901) Sydney Greenstreet (1879) Louis Pasteur (1822)
Top songs of 1978
Your age is the equivalent of a dog that is 4.21369863013699 years old. (You're still chasing cats!)
Your lucky day is Saturday.
Your lucky number is 8.
Your ruling planet(s) is Saturn & Uranus.
Your lucky dates are 8th, 17th, 26th.
Your opposition sign is Cancer.
Your opposition number(s) is 2 & 7.
Today is not one of your lucky days!
There are 192 days till your next birthday
on which your cake will have 30 candles.
Those 30 candles produce 30 BTUs,
or 7,560 calories of heat (that's only 7.5600 food Calories!) .
You can boil 3.43 US ounces of water with that many candles.
In 1978 there were approximately 3.1 million births in the US.
In 1978 the US population was approximately 203,302,031 people, 57.4 persons per square mile.
In 1978 in the US there were approximately 2,152,662 marriages (10.1%) and 1,036,000 divorces (4.9%)
In 1978 in the US there were approximately 1,921,000 deaths (9.5 per 1000)
In the US a new person is born approximately every 8 seconds.
In the US one person dies approximately every 12 seconds.
In 1978 the population of Australia was approximately 14,430,830.
In 1978 there were approximately 224,181 births in Australia.
In 1978 in Australia there were approximately 102,958 marriages and 40,608 divorces.
In 1978 in Australia there were approximately 108,425 deaths.
Your birthstone is Blue Zircon
The Mystical properties of Blue Zircon
Zircon helps one be more at peace with oneself.Some lists consider these stones to be your birthstone. (Birthstone lists come from Jewelers, Tibet, Ayurvedic Indian medicine, and other sources)
Blue Topaz, Ruby, Lapis Lazuli
Your birth tree is
Apple Tree, the LoveOf slight build, lots of charm, appeal and attraction, pleasant aura, flirtatious, adventurous, sensitive, always in love, wants to love and be loved, faithful and tender partner, very generous, scientific talents, lives for today, a carefree philosopher with imagination.
There are 190 days till Christmas 2008!
There are 203 days till Orthodox Christmas!
The moon's phase on the day you were
born was waning crescent.
My Primary Love Story
At its core, the Love Conquers All story is very romantic, triumphant, and full of courage to face yourself with honesty. The catalyst for change in your love story is usually a pivotal event, circumstance, or reevaluation of yourself.
Where should you look for these pivotal moments? Challenges may come from family and society — even yourself. Do loved ones disapprove of your partner, raise concerns you hadn't previously cared that much about? Turning points may also stem from previous obligations at work, or in promises you've made to others. Do you reschedule or delay plans with your partner because you feel the need to honor responsibilities at the office? Do you prioritize taking care of a friend in need over the needs of your mate?
These themes are echoed throughout history and recorded in diaries, novels, television and films. In Jane Austin's novel "Emma" for example, the protagonist put everybody else's romantic needs before her own. Had she not stopped to question herself, she would have missed a chance for love altogether. Was she just looking after her friends? Or was she guarding herself from the potential hurt of a relationship or unrequited love?
Ambition to be loyal to loved ones, move ahead at work, improve your home, see the world — these are all good things. But sometimes, they take precedence over your love life — whether you are conscious of it or not. That's not necessarily a bad thing, but think about it. Are you ever afraid of being held back from your goals? Or that a relationship might make attaining those goals a slower process, or change them completely?
Remember Nicolas Cage in the film "Family Man"? Through a strange twist of fate, he's given the opportunity to see life as it might have been had he gotten married instead of pursued successes at work. Though fantastical and magical, he experiences a jarring event, and through it, realizes he has different priorities. He would give up his important job and expensive belongings to be with the one woman he realizes he truly loves. And he realizes that his initial choice to pursue his career instead of pursue his relationship was driven not by his hopes for success, but his fear of taking on the seriousness of his relationship. With this insight, he has the courage to face himself, not preexisting hopes and goals.
Even if fate doesn't throw obstacles in your way, it's possible that you do. Do you shy away from romantic commitments? Do you make excuses for not dating? Do you wish your relationships never progressed passed the lovey-dovey stage? Are the people you date "all wrong" for you? There's a reason you're holding back from pursuing a good thing. You may put excuses between you and another person, or you may intentionally pick the wrong person to give you an out, an alternative to getting serious. The real courage in your love story comes from taking a good look at yourself, and questioning your motivations.
Once you recognize this as your story, you will indeed have the courage and the insight to question yourself and make a commitment, or break with someone before external events force you to. In this manner, Courage is one of the most noble and truthful love stories out there.
In "Notting Hill," Julia Roberts plays a movie star whose career (not to mention awful boyfriend) get in the way of a fledgling romance with a London bookseller (Hugh Grant). In "Autumn in New York," a cheating playboy played by Richard Gere finds himself in love with a dying 22-year-old. Will he mend his ways before it's too late? The love story that drives these plots is the same that drives your fantasies and relationships, which is why these stories can be so powerful. Of course, in the movies it's always clear just whom the lead person should hook up with. In real life, it's quite a bit harder. Love Conquers All, and now you're equipped to find it.
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
Advanced Global Personality Test Results
Advanced Global Personality Test Results
|
personality test by similarminds.com
Stability results were medium which suggests you are moderately relaxed, calm, secure, and optimistic.
Orderliness results were moderately high which suggests you are, at times, overly organized, reliable, neat, and hard working at the expense of flexibility, efficiency, spontaneity, and fun.
Extraversion results were medium which suggests you are moderately talkative, outgoing, sociable and interacting.
trait snapshot:
clean, organized, dislikes chaos, semi neat freak, perfectionist, traditional, realist, fits in most places, enjoys managing others, risk averse, good at saving money, prudent, respects authority, high self control, hard working, does not like to stand out, follows the rules, finisher, resilient, takes precautions, cautious, honest, unfamiliar with the dark side of life, practical, dutiful
carrie-d
this one's got esp... You Are Most Like Carrie! |
![]() You're quirky, flirty, and every guy's perfect first date. But can the guy in question live up to your romantic ideal? It's tough for you to find the right match - you're more than a little picky. Never fear... You've got a great group of friends and a great closet of clothes, no matter what! Romantic prediction: You'll fall for someone this year... Totally different from any guy you've dated. |
Thursday, June 5, 2008
first reactions
1. Beer: Budweiser
2. McDonald's: burger
3. Relationships: tango
4. Purple: grimace
5. Power Rangers: yellow
7. Steroids: bulky
8. Cartoons: Saturday morning
9. The President: seal
10. Tupperware: party
11. Some beach: cloudy
12. Santa Claus: Christmas
13. Halloween: cats
14. Alice: white
15. Grammar: Webster
16: Myspace: yours
17. Clowns: sad
18. Marriage: commitment
19. Paris: romance
20. Redheads: freckles
21. Pass: the Cheer (hehe…)
22. One night stands: zip
23. Donald Trump: you’re fired.
24. Neverland: Johnny Depp
25. Vanilla ice cream: pistachio cookies
28. Hookers: make-up
29. High school: drama
30. Pajamas: dreams
31. Woody: weird
32. Wet Socks: flood
33. I Love: You.