There's always some reason
To feel not good enough.
And it's hard at the end of the day.
I need some distraction,
Oh, beautiful release...
God forbid me to extremely hate a bloodline right now...
Tuesday, September 10, 2013
Monday, May 6, 2013
How Do Others See You?
So I saw this post from thoughtshappythoughts and decided to give it a go.
It's a test from Dr. Phil (yes, Oprah's Dr. Phil) and he & Oprah both took the test. He got a 55; she, a 38.
I got a 43.
According to the test:
"Others see you as fresh, lively, charming, amusing, practical, and always interesting, someone who’s constantly in the center of attention, but sufficiently well-balanced not to let it go to their head. They also see you as kind, considerate, and understanding, someone who’ll always cheer them up and help them out."
Me? People see me as someone who's constantly in the center of attention? Really?
Anyway, here's the test.
1. When do you feel your best?
A) in the morning
B) during the afternoon and early evening
C) late at night
2. You usually walk…
A) fairly fast, with long steps
B) fairly fast, with little steps
C) less fast head up, looking the world in the face
D) less fast, head down
E) very slowly
3. When talking to people you…
A) stand with your arms folded
B) have your hands clasped
C) have one or both your hands on your hips
D) touch or push the person to whom you are talking
E) play with your ear, touch your chin, or smooth your hair
4. When relaxing, you sit with…
A) your knees bent with your legs neatly side by side
B) your legs crossed
C) your legs stretched out or straight
D) one leg curled under you
5. When something really amuses you, you react with…
A) big appreciated laugh
B) a laugh, but not a loud one
C) a quiet chuckle
D) a sheepish smile
6. When you go to a party or social gathering you…
A) make a loud entrance so everyone notices you
B) make a quiet entrance, looking around for someone you know
C) make the quietest entrance, trying to stay unnoticed
7. You’re working very hard, concentrating hard, and you’re interrupted….
A) welcome the break
B) feel extremely irritated
C) vary between these two extremes
8. Which of the following colors do you like most….
A) Red or orange
B) black
C) yellow or light blue
D) green
E) dark blue or purple
F) white
G) brown or gray
9. When you are in bed at night, in those last few moments before going to sleep you are…
A) stretched out on your back
B) stretched out face down on your stomach
C) on your side, slightly curled
D) with your head on one arm
E) with your head under the covers
10. You often dream that you are…
A) falling
B) fighting or struggling
C) searching for something or somebody
D) flying or floating
E) you usually have dreamless sleep
F) your dreams are always pleasant
POINTS:
1. (a) 2 (b) 4 (c) 6
2. (a) 6 (b) 4 (c) 7 (d) 2 (e) 1
3. (a) 4 (b) 2 (c) 5 (d) 7 (e) 6
4. (a) 4 (b) 6 (c) 2 (d) 1
5. (a) 6 (b) 4 (c) 3 (d) 5 (e) 2
6. (a) 6 (b) 4 (c) 2
7. (a) 6 (b) 2 (c) 4
8. (a) 6 (b) 7 (c) 5 (d) 4 (e) 3 (f) 2 (g) 1
9. (a) 7 (b) 6 (c) 4 (d) 2 (e ) 1
10 (a) 4 (b) 2 (c) 3 (d) 5 (e) 6 (f) 1
Now add up the total number of points, check your total, and see how others see you.
OVER 60 POINTS: Others see you as someone they should handle with care. You’re seen as vain, self-centered, and extremely dominant. Others may admire you, wishing they could be more like you, but don’t always trust you, hesitating to become too deeply involved with you.
51 TO 60 POINTS: Others see you as an exciting, highly volatile, rather impulsive personality, a natural leader, who’s quick to make decisions, though not always the right ones. They see you as bold and adventuresome, someone who will try anything once, someone who takes chances and enjoys an adventure. They enjoy being in your company because of the excitement you radiate.
41 TO 50 POINTS: Others see you as fresh, lively, charming, amusing, practical, and always interesting, someone who’s constantly in the center of attention, but sufficiently well-balanced not to let it go to their head. They also see you as kind, considerate, and understanding, someone who’ll always cheer them up and help them out.
31 TO 40 POINTS: Others see you as sensible, cautious, careful, and practical. They see you as clever, gifted, or talented, but modest. Not a person who makes friends too quickly or easily, but someone who’s extremely loyal to friends you do make and who expects the same loyalty in return. Those who really get to know you, realize it takes a lot to shake your trust in your friends, but equally that it takes you a long time to get over if that trust is ever broken.
21 TO 30 POINTS: Your friends see you as painstaking and fussy. They see you as very cautious, extremely careful, a slow and steady plodder. It would really surprise them if you ever did something impulsively or on the spur of the moment, expecting you to examine everything carefully from every angle and then, usually decide against it. They think this reaction is caused partly by your careful nature.
UNDER 21 POINTS: People think you are shy, nervous, and indecisive, someone who needs looking after, who always wants someone else to make the decisions and who doesn't want to get involved with anyone or anything! They see you as a worrier who always sees problems that don’t exist. Some people think you’re boring. Only those who know you well, know that you aren't.
It's a test from Dr. Phil (yes, Oprah's Dr. Phil) and he & Oprah both took the test. He got a 55; she, a 38.
I got a 43.
According to the test:
"Others see you as fresh, lively, charming, amusing, practical, and always interesting, someone who’s constantly in the center of attention, but sufficiently well-balanced not to let it go to their head. They also see you as kind, considerate, and understanding, someone who’ll always cheer them up and help them out."
Me? People see me as someone who's constantly in the center of attention? Really?
Anyway, here's the test.
1. When do you feel your best?
A) in the morning
B) during the afternoon and early evening
C) late at night
2. You usually walk…
A) fairly fast, with long steps
B) fairly fast, with little steps
C) less fast head up, looking the world in the face
D) less fast, head down
E) very slowly
3. When talking to people you…
A) stand with your arms folded
B) have your hands clasped
C) have one or both your hands on your hips
D) touch or push the person to whom you are talking
E) play with your ear, touch your chin, or smooth your hair
4. When relaxing, you sit with…
A) your knees bent with your legs neatly side by side
B) your legs crossed
C) your legs stretched out or straight
D) one leg curled under you
5. When something really amuses you, you react with…
A) big appreciated laugh
B) a laugh, but not a loud one
C) a quiet chuckle
D) a sheepish smile
6. When you go to a party or social gathering you…
A) make a loud entrance so everyone notices you
B) make a quiet entrance, looking around for someone you know
C) make the quietest entrance, trying to stay unnoticed
7. You’re working very hard, concentrating hard, and you’re interrupted….
A) welcome the break
B) feel extremely irritated
C) vary between these two extremes
8. Which of the following colors do you like most….
A) Red or orange
B) black
C) yellow or light blue
D) green
E) dark blue or purple
F) white
G) brown or gray
9. When you are in bed at night, in those last few moments before going to sleep you are…
A) stretched out on your back
B) stretched out face down on your stomach
C) on your side, slightly curled
D) with your head on one arm
E) with your head under the covers
10. You often dream that you are…
A) falling
B) fighting or struggling
C) searching for something or somebody
D) flying or floating
E) you usually have dreamless sleep
F) your dreams are always pleasant
POINTS:
1. (a) 2 (b) 4 (c) 6
2. (a) 6 (b) 4 (c) 7 (d) 2 (e) 1
3. (a) 4 (b) 2 (c) 5 (d) 7 (e) 6
4. (a) 4 (b) 6 (c) 2 (d) 1
5. (a) 6 (b) 4 (c) 3 (d) 5 (e) 2
6. (a) 6 (b) 4 (c) 2
7. (a) 6 (b) 2 (c) 4
8. (a) 6 (b) 7 (c) 5 (d) 4 (e) 3 (f) 2 (g) 1
9. (a) 7 (b) 6 (c) 4 (d) 2 (e ) 1
10 (a) 4 (b) 2 (c) 3 (d) 5 (e) 6 (f) 1
Now add up the total number of points, check your total, and see how others see you.
OVER 60 POINTS: Others see you as someone they should handle with care. You’re seen as vain, self-centered, and extremely dominant. Others may admire you, wishing they could be more like you, but don’t always trust you, hesitating to become too deeply involved with you.
51 TO 60 POINTS: Others see you as an exciting, highly volatile, rather impulsive personality, a natural leader, who’s quick to make decisions, though not always the right ones. They see you as bold and adventuresome, someone who will try anything once, someone who takes chances and enjoys an adventure. They enjoy being in your company because of the excitement you radiate.
41 TO 50 POINTS: Others see you as fresh, lively, charming, amusing, practical, and always interesting, someone who’s constantly in the center of attention, but sufficiently well-balanced not to let it go to their head. They also see you as kind, considerate, and understanding, someone who’ll always cheer them up and help them out.
31 TO 40 POINTS: Others see you as sensible, cautious, careful, and practical. They see you as clever, gifted, or talented, but modest. Not a person who makes friends too quickly or easily, but someone who’s extremely loyal to friends you do make and who expects the same loyalty in return. Those who really get to know you, realize it takes a lot to shake your trust in your friends, but equally that it takes you a long time to get over if that trust is ever broken.
21 TO 30 POINTS: Your friends see you as painstaking and fussy. They see you as very cautious, extremely careful, a slow and steady plodder. It would really surprise them if you ever did something impulsively or on the spur of the moment, expecting you to examine everything carefully from every angle and then, usually decide against it. They think this reaction is caused partly by your careful nature.
UNDER 21 POINTS: People think you are shy, nervous, and indecisive, someone who needs looking after, who always wants someone else to make the decisions and who doesn't want to get involved with anyone or anything! They see you as a worrier who always sees problems that don’t exist. Some people think you’re boring. Only those who know you well, know that you aren't.
Sunday, March 24, 2013
What do you do when you suddenly see your ex-flame?
I once bumped into an old flame and couldn't forget the tension I felt when I saw that he also saw me. I saw how shocked & scared he was; he had to avoid the path leading to my direction. I couldn't understand why.
It made me think. Situations like that only prove that closures never really come at the time we think we, or decided to, end a relationship. Nor is it an indication that the closure has finally arrived when it happens. It is a mere indicator that we still acknowledge the effect this person still has on us or how that certain person made an impact in our lives.
Watching this video moved me to tears. I had hoped to meet him again like this, like we have acknowledged the fact everything's ok & will be ok. Maybe someday.
From Yahoo! News Canada:
In 2010, performance artist Marina Abramovic's retrospective exhibit "The Artist is Present" at New York's MoMa spanned over four decades of her prolific career.
She also staged an original work, a solo piece during which she sat in a chair at a table, facing museum visitors in silence.
As visitors sat in complete silence in the chair opposite her, Abramovic would raise her head and look them in the eye for one minute, bringing some museum-goers to tears.
What Abramovic couldn't not have anticipated was that one of those visitors would be the man she once performed with.
"Marina Abramovic and Ulay started an intense love story in the 70s, performing art out of the van they lived in. When they felt the relationship had run its course, they decided to walk the Great Wall of China, each from one end, meeting for one last big hug in the middle and never seeing each other again. In 2010, Marina performed ‘The Artist Is Present,’ a minute of silence with each stranger who sat in front of her. Ulay arrived without her knowing it and this is what happened," commenter HGiskardReventlov wrote on YouTube.
Marina Abramović e Ulay - MoMA 2010 (by MiticoMazz)
Sunday, February 10, 2013
Monday, January 21, 2013
Thursday, December 27, 2012
Thursday, November 22, 2012
"sometimes, the smallest things take the most room in your heart."
i dreamt of winnie the pooh & piglet the other night.
i don't know why i dreamt about them.
in my dream, piglet was lost and pooh and i were so worried looking for him everywhere.
the dream was so vivid, even the feeling.
i could feel pooh's worry and pain. it was so weird that i felt what he felt.
when i woke up, i was almost in tears.
i wanted to go back to the dream and look for piglet in hopes that we will find him soon,
that he just wandered off to somewhere, followed a cute butterfly.
or something like that.
that he just wandered off to somewhere, followed a cute butterfly.
or something like that.
and then i thought... i've never dreamt of pooh bear before.
and i haven't felt that kind of sadness of losing, of looking for someone so dear to me.
not in a while, though.
i hope i'm not losing something or someone soon.
Wednesday, October 10, 2012
Thursday, September 13, 2012
Tuesday, September 11, 2012
33 Things in 33 Years
1. Trust your gut. Really.
- yes and yes: 33 Things I've Learned In 33 Years
If you think he likes you, you're probably right. If you think he's cheating, you're probably right. If you think she's going to be your new BFF, (this time with feeling!) you're probably right.
2. Sunscreen. Always.
SPF 15 indoors, SPF 30 outdoors. I've been wearing sunscreen everyday since I was 19 and I still get carded. I think this actually has more to do with the bouncers hitting on me, but I'd like to share the credit with my good friend Oil of Olay daily moisturizing lotion with SPF.
3. If you're lying in bed worrying about it, get up and write it down
If I don't do this, my night will quickly devolve into cyclical thoughts of doom and anxiety. Just get out of bed, write down the thing that you're worried about, write down a few ideas to deal with it and then go the eff back to sleep.
4. Processed carbohydrates and sugars are yucky.
It's not hard to switch to wholewheat bread and noodles or substitute honey/maple syrup/raw sugar for the white stuff. It's yummy and you'll feel heaps better!
5. Maintaining friendships (and making new friends) is an active process.
Stop waiting for them to call you! Think of something fun to do, call your friends and go do it. Also, stop sitting in your apartment, devotedly wishing that you knew more cool people. Surprisingly, this will not get you any closer to making new friends. Go places where like-minded people hang out, talk to new people at parties, initiate.
6. Uncomfortable underwear can ruin your day.
At least they can ruin mine. So don't wear your sexy-times underwear on the day you have to walk ten blocks to work.
7. It really doesn't matter what you major in
What does matter? The internships you get, your work ethic, your interpersonal skills, who you know. So go ahead and get a BA in Studio Art! As long as you complement that with work experience at a graphic design studio, a museum and an ad agency.
8. Create an active lifestyle
I don't go to the gym every day. Or, um, ever in the summer. But I walk to work and to the market and just about everywhere within a 3 mile radius. If you make daily activity a habit, you won't have nearly as many moments of "how did I inadvertently gain 30 pounds?!" or "why can't I walk up a flight of stairs?!"
9. Learn to enjoy your own company
There will be times in your life when you really want to see that movie, check out that new boutique, go to Thailand and no one wants to go with you. Bummer! But that doesn't mean that you can't go by yourself and have a good time. Take baby steps and work up to doing the big stuff on your own.
10. Don't allow outside sources to determine your self-esteem
I'm still working on this one. But I think it's important to realize that just about everything in life is relative - depending on your surroundings, you could be the hottest/smartest/highest paid girl in the room. But if you walk next door? Maybe it's different story. It's important to have faith in your abilities and strong suits - regardless of how they compare to others.
11. Find out what colors and styles work (and don't work) on you. Style accordingly.
I look good in gold and browns and corals. I look good with long, wavy hair. I look good in boat-neck, three quarter length tops. It took many, many unflattering photos to figure this out.
12. When in doubt, make the effort
You will never regret wearing that nice outfit, buying the thoughtful gift for the friend you haven't heard from in a while, over-tipping. If it doesn't work out, at least you'll know you did your best.
13. Cook at home.
Seriously. You will save one million dollars. You will maintain a healthy weight. You will impress your friends.
14. There are 300 million people in America. And 6,000,000,000 in the world.
I promise you, you'll love someone else. You'll meet new friends. You'll find co-workers and neighbors that are awesome. If it's too hard (or if someone is making you feel bad) walk away. There are a million other people out there who won't make you feel bad!
15. It's easier to make money than memories
Are you throwing up in your mouth right now? I am, a little bit. But it's true. Don't take the extra shift at work and miss your friend's awesome end-of-the summer barbecue. If all your friends are springing for a weekend at a cabin near the Canadian border, save up for a few weeks and make it happen. You won't remember the two weeks of eating in and watching library dvds, but you'll remember 3 days of fun with your buddies.
16. You can find common ground with just about anyone, any where
Regardless of a person's gender, age, race or religion there are common denominators to the human experience - falling in love, being homesick, laughing at baby animals. You don't even need to speak the same language to share an appreciation for these things. You'd be amazed how far you can get with most people just by smiling and asking them questions.
17. Don't buy the cheapest version. Buy the second cheapest.
This trick has saved me a lot of money. And many hang overs. Usually the cheapest version of something (vodka, eye shadow, shoes) is noticeably dicey. But the second-cheapest? Not so bad!
18. Make an extra copy
Of your keys, your lease, your birth certificate, your social security card. Then give said copy to someone trust worthy.
19. Floss.
For realz. It's pretty gratifying in a slightly disgusting way.
20. Consider second hand, for just about everything
98% of everything I own is second hand. My blow dryer, my picture frames, my sheets (not as gross as you're imagining). They cost a fraction of what I'd pay for them new, and no one's the wiser. At least until I tell the internet that I sleep on used sheets.
21. Excuses are embarrassing
With the exception of excuses like "my grandma died" most excuses are embarrassing for everyone involved - the person giving them and the person listening to them. 'I just don't know where to start,' 'I'm tired,' 'it's too expensive' really just translate to 'I'm not making it a priority'. See? Embarrassing, right?
22. Don't ask a question if you're not prepared to hear the answer
If you ask your friend "Do I look fat in this?" you best be prepared to hear that it's not a super flattering look on you. If you ask that guy you've been seeing for five months "Where do you see this going?" you need to know he might respond in stutters, back-pedaling and comments about "keeping it light." Don't ask if you don't really, really want to know.
23. Engage in calculated risk taking
Dancing on the table, taking a spontaneous road trip by yourself to a neighboring state, trying a new type of ethnic food - it is unlikely that any of these things will kill you. But they will probably make you more interesting.
24. Learn how to live well within your meansMake a budget and stick to it. Pay off your credit cards every month. Learn to cook for yourself. Get a bike and use it (then you won't need a gym membership or all that gas for you car!) Cancel the cable. Split internet with a neighbor. Consider second hand. You'd be amazed how painless saving money can be!
25. Learn some basic photo editing skills
2. Sunscreen. Always.
SPF 15 indoors, SPF 30 outdoors. I've been wearing sunscreen everyday since I was 19 and I still get carded. I think this actually has more to do with the bouncers hitting on me, but I'd like to share the credit with my good friend Oil of Olay daily moisturizing lotion with SPF.
3. If you're lying in bed worrying about it, get up and write it down
If I don't do this, my night will quickly devolve into cyclical thoughts of doom and anxiety. Just get out of bed, write down the thing that you're worried about, write down a few ideas to deal with it and then go the eff back to sleep.
4. Processed carbohydrates and sugars are yucky.
It's not hard to switch to wholewheat bread and noodles or substitute honey/maple syrup/raw sugar for the white stuff. It's yummy and you'll feel heaps better!
5. Maintaining friendships (and making new friends) is an active process.
Stop waiting for them to call you! Think of something fun to do, call your friends and go do it. Also, stop sitting in your apartment, devotedly wishing that you knew more cool people. Surprisingly, this will not get you any closer to making new friends. Go places where like-minded people hang out, talk to new people at parties, initiate.
6. Uncomfortable underwear can ruin your day.
At least they can ruin mine. So don't wear your sexy-times underwear on the day you have to walk ten blocks to work.
7. It really doesn't matter what you major in
What does matter? The internships you get, your work ethic, your interpersonal skills, who you know. So go ahead and get a BA in Studio Art! As long as you complement that with work experience at a graphic design studio, a museum and an ad agency.
8. Create an active lifestyle
I don't go to the gym every day. Or, um, ever in the summer. But I walk to work and to the market and just about everywhere within a 3 mile radius. If you make daily activity a habit, you won't have nearly as many moments of "how did I inadvertently gain 30 pounds?!" or "why can't I walk up a flight of stairs?!"
9. Learn to enjoy your own company
There will be times in your life when you really want to see that movie, check out that new boutique, go to Thailand and no one wants to go with you. Bummer! But that doesn't mean that you can't go by yourself and have a good time. Take baby steps and work up to doing the big stuff on your own.
10. Don't allow outside sources to determine your self-esteem
I'm still working on this one. But I think it's important to realize that just about everything in life is relative - depending on your surroundings, you could be the hottest/smartest/highest paid girl in the room. But if you walk next door? Maybe it's different story. It's important to have faith in your abilities and strong suits - regardless of how they compare to others.
11. Find out what colors and styles work (and don't work) on you. Style accordingly.
I look good in gold and browns and corals. I look good with long, wavy hair. I look good in boat-neck, three quarter length tops. It took many, many unflattering photos to figure this out.
12. When in doubt, make the effort
You will never regret wearing that nice outfit, buying the thoughtful gift for the friend you haven't heard from in a while, over-tipping. If it doesn't work out, at least you'll know you did your best.
13. Cook at home.
Seriously. You will save one million dollars. You will maintain a healthy weight. You will impress your friends.
14. There are 300 million people in America. And 6,000,000,000 in the world.
I promise you, you'll love someone else. You'll meet new friends. You'll find co-workers and neighbors that are awesome. If it's too hard (or if someone is making you feel bad) walk away. There are a million other people out there who won't make you feel bad!
15. It's easier to make money than memories
Are you throwing up in your mouth right now? I am, a little bit. But it's true. Don't take the extra shift at work and miss your friend's awesome end-of-the summer barbecue. If all your friends are springing for a weekend at a cabin near the Canadian border, save up for a few weeks and make it happen. You won't remember the two weeks of eating in and watching library dvds, but you'll remember 3 days of fun with your buddies.
16. You can find common ground with just about anyone, any where
Regardless of a person's gender, age, race or religion there are common denominators to the human experience - falling in love, being homesick, laughing at baby animals. You don't even need to speak the same language to share an appreciation for these things. You'd be amazed how far you can get with most people just by smiling and asking them questions.
17. Don't buy the cheapest version. Buy the second cheapest.
This trick has saved me a lot of money. And many hang overs. Usually the cheapest version of something (vodka, eye shadow, shoes) is noticeably dicey. But the second-cheapest? Not so bad!
18. Make an extra copy
Of your keys, your lease, your birth certificate, your social security card. Then give said copy to someone trust worthy.
19. Floss.
For realz. It's pretty gratifying in a slightly disgusting way.
20. Consider second hand, for just about everything
98% of everything I own is second hand. My blow dryer, my picture frames, my sheets (not as gross as you're imagining). They cost a fraction of what I'd pay for them new, and no one's the wiser. At least until I tell the internet that I sleep on used sheets.
21. Excuses are embarrassing
With the exception of excuses like "my grandma died" most excuses are embarrassing for everyone involved - the person giving them and the person listening to them. 'I just don't know where to start,' 'I'm tired,' 'it's too expensive' really just translate to 'I'm not making it a priority'. See? Embarrassing, right?
22. Don't ask a question if you're not prepared to hear the answer
If you ask your friend "Do I look fat in this?" you best be prepared to hear that it's not a super flattering look on you. If you ask that guy you've been seeing for five months "Where do you see this going?" you need to know he might respond in stutters, back-pedaling and comments about "keeping it light." Don't ask if you don't really, really want to know.
23. Engage in calculated risk taking
Dancing on the table, taking a spontaneous road trip by yourself to a neighboring state, trying a new type of ethnic food - it is unlikely that any of these things will kill you. But they will probably make you more interesting.
24. Learn how to live well within your meansMake a budget and stick to it. Pay off your credit cards every month. Learn to cook for yourself. Get a bike and use it (then you won't need a gym membership or all that gas for you car!) Cancel the cable. Split internet with a neighbor. Consider second hand. You'd be amazed how painless saving money can be!
25. Learn some basic photo editing skills
Because that photo from your vacation would make a great Facebook profile photo if you didn't have that giant zit, right? Photoscape, Picnik and Gimp are all great options!
26. If you don't know what you say, silence is always an option
I learned this from my friend Ellie, who used this approach to deal with unruly patients during her years as a nurse in NYC. If someone says something you don't like (and don't know how to respond to) just stare at them and don't say anything. Totally. terrifying. And totally effective!
27. If you don't know, ask
26. If you don't know what you say, silence is always an option
I learned this from my friend Ellie, who used this approach to deal with unruly patients during her years as a nurse in NYC. If someone says something you don't like (and don't know how to respond to) just stare at them and don't say anything. Totally. terrifying. And totally effective!
27. If you don't know, ask
Because that thing that people say about assuming (it makes an ass out of you and me)? That's true.
28. Do something different with your weekends
After a week in the cubicle farm, I know it's tempting to spend your weekend watching DVDs, running errands, going to house parties and nursing hangovers. But doing the same thing every weekend gets old. And you won't return to work reinvigorated or inspired. You don't have to do anything earth shattering - have a sleep over with old friends, go camping in a State Park, rent bikes and ride through your city, try a new ethnic restaurant, look up the top tourist sights in your city and check them out. Milk those two days off for all they're worth!
29. Stay in touch
After a week in the cubicle farm, I know it's tempting to spend your weekend watching DVDs, running errands, going to house parties and nursing hangovers. But doing the same thing every weekend gets old. And you won't return to work reinvigorated or inspired. You don't have to do anything earth shattering - have a sleep over with old friends, go camping in a State Park, rent bikes and ride through your city, try a new ethnic restaurant, look up the top tourist sights in your city and check them out. Milk those two days off for all they're worth!
29. Stay in touch
In the age of skype/facebook/texting there's absolutely no reason that you can't maintain regular contact with your childhood bestie or that cool girl from your freshman comp class. Maintaining and fostering friendships is super important. Also, you'll have more couches to crash on when you go traveling!
30. Find a creative outlet
Most of us aren't 100% creatively fulfilled by our day jobs. Even those of us who work in creative fields! Engaging different parts of your brain (and different parts of your personality) is hugely, hugely gratifying. Seriously, you cannot overestimate how having a good hobby can change your life. I'm not exaggerating when I tell you that after I started blogging, I needed less sleep and was a much happier person. Truth.
31. Act like you know what you're doing
You can pretty much conquer the world with a confident walk, a well-thought-out outfit and confident demeanor. We teach people how to treat us and when you show people that you're a force to be reckoned with, they'll believe you.
32. When you ask friends or family to do things for free, you end up paying in stress and time
Of course, we can't all afford to hire movers/painters/accountants/etc. But when you ask your cousin to photograph your wedding or your college roommate to design your website or your little sister to help you move - what you don't spend in money you just might spend in missed deadlines and ruined carpet. Our friends and family love us and want to help. But it's not the same. And you know it. If you can, pay a stranger to do things for you. Then you won't feel bad complaining.
33. Most things in life will cost twice as much and/or take twice as long as you thought
32. When you ask friends or family to do things for free, you end up paying in stress and time
Of course, we can't all afford to hire movers/painters/accountants/etc. But when you ask your cousin to photograph your wedding or your college roommate to design your website or your little sister to help you move - what you don't spend in money you just might spend in missed deadlines and ruined carpet. Our friends and family love us and want to help. But it's not the same. And you know it. If you can, pay a stranger to do things for you. Then you won't feel bad complaining.
33. Most things in life will cost twice as much and/or take twice as long as you thought
Particularly travel or home improvements or building up a client base. There are always unexpected fees and raised prices. Have a backup plan! Or budget way, way more time and money than you think you'll need and you'll be presently surprised when things come in ahead of schedule and under budget.
What about you? What have you learned so far? What do you wish someone would have told you?
What about you? What have you learned so far? What do you wish someone would have told you?
- yes and yes: 33 Things I've Learned In 33 Years
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